My diary :)

i was searching through for my i pod in my cupboard..and it was a whole lot of mess..all my clothes,posters,wallet,slam books and millions of other teeny-weeny things had formed a huge heap inside my cupboard.i was shaking and shifting that huge heap of my stuff when something fell down with a thud.i looked down to see the long-forgotten diary of mine. [oww..dun think dat i'm a regular diary writer or anythn! :p i hav taken resolutions for lyk..millions of times..dat i'd write my in my diary everyday..i'd either be lazy about writing or else i'd just forget that i've got 2 write..i srsly envy people who write diaries daily..i wish i could do dat too! :( ] 

then i flipped through the pages of my diary..it had all kinds of things..lyrics from my favourite song,graffiti,my thoughts and what not.? :P and i bet you wont believe me when i tell you this.but the first few entries in my diary were written when i was nine or something..:P seriously! [now..isnt dat kinda weird.? keeping the same diary for lyk..7 years or something.?and i'm just waiting for dis diary to get over so that i can just take my favourite diary out n start writing in that! i hav a whole lot of diaries wimme..:P :) :D well..me finishing that diary.? i dun think that's gonna happen..that would take..years..decades.. centuries..:Por whatever..a very long time,that's what i mean..]
My diary is so very special as it has my entries as a nine year old..and till now..oops..dont think that its a gigantic diary to fill my whole school life into it.its like,a collection of,very random,discontinuous entries..and its almost like 5 or 6 entries per year..yea..seriously!! :P [by now,you'd noe dat i'm a lazybone! :P ;]
and the things i've written in there..omg..they're all so embarrassing! [i get embarrassed with almost everything..but this isnt like that! there r some real embarrassing stuff in there..trust me!! ]
but even though all those entries are super-embarrassing,they are really special in some weird way.its almost like i have a time turner with me and i am reliving my past years..:) I laughed at the stewpid and silly things i used to cry for,as a kid. [when i was nine,i had a contest with my classmate for the maximum number of "good"s on my notebook..and sadly,i lost the conto by the difference of one "good"..:( :P
and i kinda caused a havoc in the class.i cried n made scenes n what not.? :P
and then in 6th grade,i cried because i was made the class monitor! ]
my stomache ached..laughing at all this.! :p  
but some entries..i almost cried reading them..seriously..the fun i had with my old friends..my old school..life at chalakudy.. how much miss all that!
And it felt really weird when i realized that i laughed reading the things i cried about..and i cried reading about the fun..the laughter! [now..isnt this real bizarre.? ]

And i sat on my bed for god knows how long..reading..thinkin'..staring at the pages..:)
ow..my diary is truly amazing..:P I could actually see the tiny little me grow reading that! [or lets say.."evolve"] into what i am now.. :) 

"what's in a name.? " "EVERYTHING"

i totally hate my name.. "MEDHA.V" [the initial "v" makes it worse..duh!!]  n there are clear reasons why..
okay..let me tell you the "history" behind my stewpid name..[most of you might know it..but still..:P ]
my parents used to live in Pune before i was born..n i guess they used to love the life there.."medha" is a very common name over there. [even the name of the doctor who checked my mom when she had me was medha!]
so when i was born,they named me "medha" as a remembrance of pune n their life there..now now,how cruel.. :(
just because they like the place,they cant name their kid [aka meh!! =) ] with the weirdest name of the place!!
i've always hated my name and i still do..but mom n dad claim that there's no name better than this one..DUH!!
they could have named me with cute names..like.."iris" or something..:( why MEDHA.?!
something that makes me hate my name even more is the way people pronounce it..sometimes it would be "metha" [which embarrasses me to the core..] and "megha" the most common..i get so pissed off when people mispronounce my name..mispronouncing makes my name sound horribler!! [is there anything horribler thab the word horribler.?! naw..i dont think so..=P thats the limit! ]
and the initials..omg..! "V" :((  sometimes people read my name and my initial together.."MEDHAVI"  [which means "leader" in malayalam..] i even had a teacher in my 5th grade who was like.."hmm..medhavi..thats your name? your name has it! i think i should make you the class leader!"  i thought she was joking..but omg..she was serious..she made me the class monitor the next day..and i proved to be the worst class monitor ever.! :P
[i talked along with the other students!! :P class monitor had the license to talk..:P]
and there's another teacher who made me a member of the school environmental club or something of the sort because my name was medha..["wow..your name is medha! nice name nice name..i should surely make you a member of the environmental club..after all your name comes after the great environmentalist medha patkar..you know!" ]
people always compare me to medha patkar when they hear my name..me n medha patkar..yea! :O
i feel so "i-dunno-what" when i hear that..[not that i hate medha patkar or anything..i love her n the passion with which she speaks! :) its just that i hate being compared! with anyone..be it in a good sense or bad..i hate it..]
 and i remember another teacher who misread my "medha" as "mehta" and asked me if was a north indian n whether "mehta" was my surname..n i remember standing infront of her like a stone..not able to bear my embarrassment!
and my name is so rare [especially in kerala..] that you never find another person with your name..i envy all those with very common names because they can see their names on boards,as names of bakeries, as the name of a film heroine, names of restaurants,gift shops..:[ i've never seen "medha" anywhere! but yes..once i've seen a flourescent orange bus with bright blue writing on it.."MEDHA TRAVELS" i was overjoyed seeing that! i was happy the whole day! :D i actually saw my name on a bus..unbelievable! :P
and i even managed to find a girl whose name is "medha"..my dad's friend's daughter..hehhee..:D
i felt so happy to know that her name was medha too! :P

but then..there's another name i totally love! :) n thats "medz"..
err..who named me "medz".?  ehem ehem..its me who invented that name..for myself..:P  [pretty cool..huh?] more than the way it sounds..i like the fact that it was ME who started that out.and i wanted people to call me that.so from one fine morning,i started calling myself "medz"..:) [and that felt so damn good! :)] i started signing in people's slam books as "medz"..i changed my orkut name to "medz"..
so slowly my friends started calling me that..they started saving my number in their phones with the name "medz"..they wrote in my slam book.."dear medz" n stuff like that..:P
but then..everyone aint good at pronouncing "medz"..some of my besties are damn good at it though..especially kitty..i love it when she calls me medz! :) hers is the "perfectest" pronounciation in d whole wide world..:P [i mean the way she says "medz"..nothin else! :P ]
and guess what.? people even started making nicknames out of "medz"..like "medzie" n all..:P
hehhee..:D i know it sounds real weird..but its way better than "medha"! :P